This is Big Brother, Munya, please report to the diary room. I repeat, Munya, please report to the diary room, er, pretty please with a cherry on top.
Munya: Hi Big Brother, what’s happening
Oh, I don’t know, what’s up with you?
Munya: Er, well, the task is a bit of a bitch really, nuh’mean? But we are trying
Big Brother doesn’t want to know about the others, Big Brother wants to know what’s going on in your life. Like, you know, what’s up with you and Tawana?
Munya: She’s just a friend. She tells great stories. Bedtime stories from old women with short hair make me horny Big Brother
Big Brother wants to feel you, er, feels for you. So, are you, you know, into older chics and stuff, or is it just Tawana
Munya: Nuh dawg, I just felt her then. When I went to Finland, I was with a younger gal, man!
Munya: I’m sorry?
Big Brother said thanks. Big Brother appreciates your openness. Big Brother would like to know what you think of Big Brother
Munya: Well that third person shit is a tad annoying
GET. OUT! Seriously? Big Brother apologises. It won’t happen again. Are you happy?
Munya: A bit
Would Munya like a foot massage or something. It’s really no trouble. Big Brother likes Munya
Munya: Nuh, biggie, I’m cool.
No, really, Big Brother like totally LIKES Munya. Does Munya want Big Brother to tell him a bedtime story…did I mention that big brother has no hair?
Munya: Hehe, Biggie, you got jokes, haha.
That’s not all that Big Brother’s got…and Big Brother wasn’t joking… you have hurt Big Big Brother’s feelings…you bitch!
Munya: Damn, bro, calm down
Leave the diary room! And call Ricco, no, I’ll do it myself. Don’t do me any favours!
<<<Munya leaves the diary room>>>
*sniff, sniff* This is BIG BROTHER… Ricco *sniff* report to the diary room!
Ricco: Hey Big Brother
Hey Ricco, how’re you doin? Biggie noticed you started wearing a shirt around the house.
Ricco: Well, er. Once in a while. Biggie. Were viewers complaining? Hehehe
Big Brother wants Ricco to know that its okay for him to walk around without his shirt on. It’s a free country and whatever
Ricco: Thanks Big Brother
Call me Richard.
Ricco: Er, okay… Richard.
Big Brother also wants Ricco to know there’s absolutely nothing wrong with walking around with no pants on… Big Brother winks at Ricco
Ricco: Uhm, why is Biggie winkin
Ricco: Why is Richard winking at me?
Coz, you know, we like mates and stuff. You must be really lonely seeing as all your girls have been taken. Is Ricco lonely?
Ricco: Well, you get used to it, you know wha’ mean?
Surely you want someone to, like, sleep with and stuff. Big Brother gets lonely too. Big Brother feels your pain. Big Brother is pained.
Ricco: I’m fine Big… Richard, really.
Big Brother admires your courage in the face of loneliness and would like to reward you. But Big Brother is still sad. If Ricco will make Big Brother happy, big Brother will make Ricco happy.
Ricco: Oh yeah, now you’re talking, are you sending in a stripper?
No, you big silly… go to the glass house and welcome you newest housemate
<<<Ricco goes to the glass house where he meets the newest housemate>>>
Hi Ricco, how about you lock those doors and make Big Brother happy…
This post wasn’t really necessary, but I owe someone a post so…
Consider us even