hi, my name is ivan, and I've got the flu. . .

The initial idea was to type out something about Nairobi, experimenting with different types of meat, meeting Idols and a dude at the airport with the tact of an undertaker, going around asking “what is final destination?”

That is, I was supposed to type out something about Thursday last week and the days that followed, but I kept putting it off, and now, I’ve been brought down by the blasted flu.

To a degree it’s really my fault. I kept ignoring it figuring it would go away of its own accord with time. It probably will, but I don’t have the time…and the pretty young thing in front of me at the cinema might be getting a little agitated with all the snorting and sneezing.

(*sneeze* eugh, gross…oh I beg your pardon, I’ll take that, thank you.)

The situation wasn’t improved by the cold shower this morning. Seriously, I can’t remember water being that cold. My follicles froze, fell off and a new batch of unsuspecting follicles sprung forth. They too fell off, because follicles are given to suicidal and carefree tendencies. I am keeping the new lot firmly tucked under warm clothing.

I’ve started taking medicine for it, some drug with the uninspired name; FluCold. I can’t help but wonder how they arrived at this.

(Boardroom at some pharmaceutical firm

“seems to me like a tie. We will adopt both Flu and Cold as the name for this drug; now let’s go shoot some hoops…”)

It goes without saying, I needed a handkerchief at some point during this ordeal. The lady at the shop went through the routine that usually comes with such purchases;

She: What?!

Me: Hanky!

She: Color?

Me: white…

She: Size?

Me: er, bed sheet.

She: Take

What I don’t get, during this whole thing, is the whole color thing. Why are hadkerchiefs made in any other color? Scratch that, why try to glamorize something we are going to wipe away snot or sweat with?

I’ll probably post about the Nairobi experience later, I’m done with this; mourning my morning.

For you, that you may find your feet.

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5 Comments

  • 31337 Reply June 5, 2008

    you were ‘ere and you did not say a word? holla at a brother! i shall [im]patiently wait for the chronicles of Nairobi, wait did you say the flu? was wondering where the buggery came from, it was YOU who brought it round!! …snort!!!

  • Carlo Reply June 6, 2008

    No Ivan, you’re not dying of flu. You’ll be fine. Rouge tonight? And then later Club? Don’t mind the cold, just wear a heavy jacket and you’ll be ait. Besides, you’ll ditch it as soon as we get all hot and sweaty dancing. Come now.

    PS. Still waiting for Nai chronicles.

  • Miss Cheri Reply June 7, 2008

    Sorry sweelie…see what comes with hanging around those people…

    Eh, but Carlo, where were u when I fell sick? You’re the sort of friend one needs.

    Ivan, u’re fast becoming Vasco Da Gama…travelling and all…

  • DeTamble Reply June 12, 2008

    Flu. Oh crap. You too! It’s evil, isn’t it?!?!?! Tell me it’s evil so that I don’t feel so stupid when I go ask the priest to exorcise my Flu(Cold)!!!

  • Its been a while since i came to these pages and i am mighty pleased…the board room conjuring of the name left me bawling over…in laughter….

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