slice & dice: Blame it on me – Akon

Artist: Akon
Album: Sorry, Blame It On Me
Title: Sorry, Blame It On Me

As life goes on I’m starting to learn more and more about responsibility
(responsibility? dude, you were supposed to be in Kenya 5 freakin times, and postponed your Ugandan performance, WTF are you going on about?)
I realize everything I do is affecting the people around me (no shit?!)
So I want to take this time out and apologize for things I have done (**** you! I could have spent that

money on other things and still had enough left over for a cab home!)
And things that have not occurred yet (pssssh, like what? your concert??)
And the things they don’t want to take responsibility for (I’m guessing this would be Celtel you’re talking

about, but that’s just me…)

I’m sorry for the times that I left you home (No worries, gave me a chance to watch my stash)
I was on the road and you were alone ( no i wasn’t. I had company…wink wink)
I’m sorry for the times that I had to go (seriously, no harm done)
I’m sorry for the fact that I did not know (ignorance is bliss, my friend)
That you were sitting home just wishing we (hang on, we??)
Could go back to when it was just you and me (fuck no! that’s not how i roll, I love Marsha Thomason)
I’m sorry for the times I would neglect (damn right, wait… no no, this is all wrong!)
I’m sorry for the times I disrespect ( nigger this whole verse is disrespect)

I’m sorry for the wrong things that I’ve done ( there’s no way in hell you’re talking about your concert)
I’m sorry I’m not always there for my son (well played, you know I can’t diss you for that)
I’m sorry for the fact that I’m not aware ( i’m picking up that vibe again)
That you can’t sleep at night when I am not there ( there it is again!)
Because I’m in the streets like everyday (Well someone has to bring the money home)
Sorry for the things that I did not say (I’m sorrier for the ones you did say!)
Like how you are the best thing in my world (uh, okay…)
And how I’m so proud to call you my girl (what the f***!!)
I understand that there are some problems (soaring food prices, no freedom of speech, bad roads, a

brother can’t get laid anymore unless its at a concert…yeah, we got problems)
And I am not too blind to know (Yes you are, otherwise you’d come for the friggin concert)
All the pain you kept inside you (I wouldn’t actually call “it” pain)
Even though you might not show (Oh I show! )
If I can apologize for being wrong (heh)
Then it’s just a shame on me (ya think?)
I’ll be the reason for your pain and you can put the blame on me (Ill fitting boxer shorts are to blame as well)

[Chorus] You can put the blame on me [4x] (I intend to)
Said you can put the blame on me [3x] ( I heard)
You can put the blame on me ( you know what, nuh, I’ll blame Celtel instead, I’m not falling for this reverse

psychology shit)

Sorry for the things that he put you through (yeah, retakes are a bitch, darn lecturers!)
And all the times you didn’t know what to do ( I knew, I just had no time)
Sorry that you had to go and sell those packs (snitch!)
Just trying to stay busy till you heard from Dad (It was for the money, fool!)
And you would rather be home with all your kids (SNITCH!)
As one big family with love and bliss (love and bliss won’t pay the rent)
And even though Pops treated us like kings (pops? what the hell?)

He got a second wife and you didn’t agree ( He did? Auntie “so and so” was his WIFE?)
He got up and left you there all alone (Its aiiight, i needed the sleep)
I’m sorry that you had to do it on your own (sometimes that’s the best way)
I’m sorry that I went and added to your grief (walking in on people generally does that)
I’m sorry that your son was once a thief (once? dude, you still don’t show up for concerts…)
I’m sorry that I grew up way too fast (It was cheaper that way, don’t apologise)
I wish I would’ve listened and not be so bad (I didn’t say that. That was auntie “so and so”)
I’m sorry your life turned out this way (writing in brackets is actually okay, don’t feel too bad)
I’m sorry the FEDS came and took me away ( I’m not…)

[Bridge]

I’m sorry that it took so long to see
They were dead wrong trying to put it on me (why would they, you just cancelled your concerts)
I’m sorry that it took so long to speak (what? you had stuff in your mouth?)
But I was on tour with Gwen Stefani (oh, you had HER in your MOUTH)
I’m sorry for the hand that she was dealt (I won’t even go there. I’m a pervert, but this is beneath me)
For the embarrassment that she felt (these lines just write themselves dont they?)
Just a little young girl trying to have fun (Gwen Stefani is NOT little or young…some may even argue that

she is not a girl)
Her daddy should never let her out that young (I suspect we are no longer talking about Gwen)
I’m sorry for Club Zen getting shut down (Shit! I wish that had been Silk and their snobbish Lounge section)
I hope they manage better next time around (How do you manage something that is shut down, what

does this look like? Zimbabwe?)
How was I to know she was underage (Ask for ID before doing anything…)
Enter 21 you know the club they say (that is so wrong on so many levels)
Why doesn’t anybody wanna take blame (because dis is Africa where we all righteous broda!)
For rising back out disgracing my name (you’ve done a lot of that on your own)
I’m just a singer trying to entertain (yeah, from far far away… we were in Uganda, did you get lost?)
Because I love my fans I’ll take that blame (Keep that shit, don’t take the blame, take the next flight out of

Vegas and come perform)
Even though the blame’s on you [3x] ( how did this become about me?)
I’ll take that blame from you (It wasn’t my fault!!!)

And you can put that blame on me [2x] You can put that blame on m
And you can put that blame on me ( messed up reverse psychology!)

Comments

comments

13 Comments

  • Tandra Reply May 6, 2008

    yes..boots! …..
    to read!

  • 31337 Reply May 7, 2008

    he done went and put his futs in his mouth, t…hey don’t want us to be together ?/ it doesnt really matter anymore…

  • The 27th Comrade Reply May 7, 2008

    The Kenyans are kind. Ugandans will kill for their music. Lemme see if he shows on Friday.

  • tumwijuke Reply May 7, 2008

    Priceless!

  • Carlo Reply May 7, 2008

    Priceless indeed! Let’s all boycott Akon. And his ‘supposed’ concert. Ok, those of us that never intended to go anyway. What say you Ivan you rip up the ticket to shreds and throw it in the bin? You’ll feel much better I tell you. Even though you’ll be 120k in loss, you’ll still feel better.

  • Princess Reply May 7, 2008

    Pretty cut up about him, aren’t you?
    [you were very scathing about him in your pre-Akon concert article in the paper though, weren’t you?]

    *Cheer up, it’s only a measly 120 k! 😀

    [it helps that I couldn’t get a ticket.LOL]

  • Minty Reply May 7, 2008

    Very funny. I am willing to bet that this post is going to do rounds on the email circuit. I hope Akon gets to read it too.

  • MAjorly
    Thanks Aivan..
    Thanks!

  • Peace Reply May 7, 2008

    Now I’m at peace. I was dying to hear someone echo my feelings about Akon in such beautiful writing. Good!

  • Miss Cheri Reply May 8, 2008

    A-Con!

    Nuff Sed.

  • duksey Reply May 14, 2008

    oh , I’m happy thanks man,I hope he gets constipation

  • antipop Reply May 14, 2008

    i totally agree. i almost went for the show, just so i could sneak in a gun and blow his arrogand stupid brains out. and then i remembered that i did not actuali own a gun

  • Chanel Reply June 10, 2008

    I tried to open up a club called Eggers who could egg the Idiot but Ugandans you are very disappointing. One minute you are all for ‘I hate the A-Con’, the next you are trying to own some of his sweat and rob him of his pennies. Why no one beat the life out of him when he tried to pull those American stunts beats me.

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