I have been dreading this. The return to the Blogosphere.I really wish I had a great excuse for the absence. I do, actually. And as far as excuses go, this one is great. Wonâ€™t get into it though, not really my style.
While I was away, Ernest introduced me to Lolcats. Its, by his definition, this phenom that has swept the states like a craze involving pix of cats and silly captionsâ€¦and very bad grammar. In fact, that is one of the reasons I have abstained from blogging for a bit. I was actually afraid that my grammar had been taintedâ€¦
Joshi is bringing back his Askari tales, and how awesome is that? Thereâ€™s some inspiration in there somewhat. I want to make money so bad; I am without a fitting idiom. Thatâ€™s just how bad itâ€™s gotten.
There is an advert thatâ€™s been running in the press lately. Itâ€™s a loan thingy from Barclays and then thereâ€™s a lingering question, â€œWhat would you do with it?â€. Iâ€™m sorry Barclays, but I cannot tell you that. Why donâ€™t you just give me the money without the questions? I imagine the transaction will go thus;
Me: I saw your ad in the paper.
They: So you want a loan? Of 20 million? Like in our advert?
Me: Uh, yes. Actually. I just want money. It doesnâ€™t need to be 20 million. I just want to â€œbe aroundâ€
They: Of course. Now sign here and answer me thisâ€¦.What will you do with it?
They: But surely, you musta seen it coming. Its in the advert.
Me: I just thought it was part of the creative process.
They: Creative what? Anyway, what do you want to be around for?
Me: I just want to have some money on me, you know, so when my friends are buying airtime I can also pull out my money and say â€œBoy, bring me airtime of 100,000/= also.â€ I want to be able to pay for my fare in the taxi. Iâ€™m tired of that deal I have to make with the taxi conductor where I sit on him and I donâ€™t have to payâ€¦
They: Youâ€¦you sit on the conductor?
Me: Times are hardâ€¦
The other day I picked up Greyâ€™s Anatomy which we all know is a chic seriesâ€¦which is why I didnâ€™t pick it up for myself. So, she borrows it, yeah, and then she says that its 24. That was funny on very many levels. I hate 24. Then again, I reasoned, as I have been known to, that it was Greyâ€™s 24 Hour Anatomy. Then I was asked to shut up.
Bought a new housing for my phone. It gives the false impression that I have in fact purchased a new phone. Until the battery bars drop dramatically from full to zilch. I suspect they move to someone elseâ€™s phone, because everyone else seems to have full batteries. And they say shit like, â€œ Thatâ€™s odd, I could have sworn I had no more battery â€œpowerâ€â€¦Ivan, is your phone still donating battery?â€
I have network though, loads of it. In fact, I am tempted to think that my battery never is charged but what I see is in fact the network bars as they are touring the edges of my screen.
Speaking of screens, this paragraph has been added in an attempt to pass time. I was tired of looking at the screen and then it hit me. This is not going anywhere. The page is still loading. Taking its sweet time, the page is.
I have come to accept that life is too short to wallow in self pity and all. Rather, look back, smile as you remember the good stuff. And if numbers make senseâ€¦.hereâ€™s looking at you.